THE recently concluded series of Married At First Sight had plenty of interesting moments. One of the big takeaways from the show was the portrayal of men, who this year, were mostly very down-to-earth, romantic and genuine.
And even though some relationships didn’t work out, I’m sure there will be no shortage of women banging at their doors!
One thing that really resonated with me was a comment from expert Mel Schilling. When the groom, Thomas, said he just wants to be accepted after the end of a relationship, Mel’s response was, ‘Go where you are more than accepted; go where you are celebrated.’ And this is something we all need to remember. Being celebrated makes you feel that your partner values and appreciates you. Just a simple sharing of an achievement on an Instagram story or buying flowers to celebrate something at work is enough; it doesn’t have to be a large gesture.
Someone I dated many years ago was so supportive of my achievements. He would leave notes telling me how proud he was of my writing and always told me how lucky he was to have me. That made me feel so loved and that’s exactly also the feeling we should be chasing.
However, when we reach our 40s and sadly find ourselves still single, the list of things you look for in a partner dwindles. You care less about how tall someone is or whether they have a six-pack or not. You just want a nice guy who loves you for you. And you are probably going to settle for much less than you deserve.
But what do you want? It’s okay to be a little picky. After a very long time, I have been dipping my toe back into the dating world. It’s as soul-destroying as it was before, but I found myself overlooking things that were important to me.
I wanted someone who lived alone because I value independence. Someone taller than me so that I can wear heels. And someone that will encourage and support what I do. But those men don’t seem to be out there. But it doesn’t mean that they’re not there. It isn’t all take. Single women also want someone by their side whose achievements they can celebrate - their career, side hustle and wins. We are here to be each other’s cheerleaders.
So, as we step into 2024, let’s find a partner who is proud to be standing by your side, celebrates you and when you succeed, cheers the loudest.
Isaac Newton’s birthplace, WoolsthorpeManor, Lincolnshire
