LONDON EXHIBITION FEATURES ARTIST’S VARIED EXPERIMENTS WITH THE MEDIUM
AMIT ROY
THERE are some 340 works of art at the Royal Academy London’s “ground-breaking” new exhibition, Picasso and Paper, one of the most comprehensive of its kind. It is worth noting that the artist was influenced by African culture.
In fact, there is a photograph of Picasso, taken in 1908 in his studio when he was 27, surrounded by African objects.
The three curators from the institutions which have put the exhibition together – Ann Dumas from the Royal Academy, William Robinson from the Cleveland Museum of Art and Emilia Philippot from Musée National Picasso in Paris – spent four and-a-half years making their selections.
These have been divided into rooms dealing with Picasso’s blue and rose periods, Cubism and surrealism, his reaction to the Second World War, his visits to the circus and the theatre, his reflections on both violence and tenderness using the Minotaur and how he kept “reinventing himself”. His art remained youthful and vibrant even as he approached death after an 80-year career at the age of 91 in 1973.
“One of the most important artists of the 20th century, Pablo Picasso (1881-1973) worked across a range of mediums including painting, sculpture, ceramics and graphic arts,” the Royal Academy points out.
“He also invented a universe of art involving paper. His prolonged engagement with the medium grew from the artist’s deep appreciation of the physical world and his desire to manipulate diverse materials. He drew incessantly, using many different media, including watercolour, pastel and gouache, on a broad range of papers. He assembled collages of cut-and-pasted papers; created sculptures from pieces of torn and burnt paper; produced both documentary photographs and manipulated photographs on paper; and spent decades investigating an array of printmaking techniques on paper supports.”
Picasso’s great masterpiece of the Blue Period, La Vie, 1903, is on display with preparatory drawings and other works on paper exploring corresponding themes of poverty, despair and social alienation.
We are told that “Picasso didn’t just draw on paper – he tore it, burnt it, and made it three-dimensional.
From studies for Guernica to a 4.8-metre-wide collage, this exhibition brings together more than 300 works on paper spanning the artist’s 80-year career.
“For Picasso, paper was both a tool to explore his ideas and a material with limitless possibilities.
He experimented with everything from newsprint and napkins to decorative wallpaper. He spent decades investigating printmaking techniques, sourcing rare and antique paper from as far as Japan – and all without losing his compulsion to draw on every last scrap.
“From effortlessly expressive drawings that led to towering sculptures to the colossal collage, Femmes à leur toilette, Picasso’s work with paper spans his entire lifetime and showcases his constant drive to invent and innovate.”
Picasso’s drawings are featured alongside key examples of the variety of printing techniques that he explored – etching, drypoint, engraving, aquatint, lithograph and linocut. The exhibition includes a remarkable documentary which follows Picasso brush stroke by brush stroke and show an artwork in the moment of creation. He left behind literally hundreds of sketchbooks “where the seeds of revolutionary masterpieces first took shape”.
There has been talk of how Picasso abused the many women in his life and some think that he represented himself as the Minotaur, the human figure with the head of a bull from Greek mythology.
But Robinson said during a guided tour: “He would be horrified if he could hear us. He takes things from his personal life but creates universal images out of them. The humanity of his works is what strikes me.”
Philippot revealed that Picasso “always had a sketch book in his pocket – like a studio in a pocket – for notes and ideas”, while Dumas summed up, “It’s a very rich exhibition, you probably have to come back a few times”.
Picasso and Paper is at the Royal Academy until April 13, 2020.
Banu Mushtaq has made literary history by becoming the first Kannada writer to win the International Booker Prize. The 2025 award was given for her short story collection Heart Lamp, a collaboration with translator Deepa Bhasthi, who rendered the work into English. The pair will share the £50,000 prize, which was presented at a ceremony at London’s Tate Modern on 20 May.
Published by Penguin Random House India, Heart Lamp is a collection of twelve short stories written between 1990 and 2023. It explores the lives of women in southern India, particularly in Karnataka, portraying their struggles and strength within patriarchal communities. The stories are grounded in regional oral storytelling traditions and have been praised for their wit, vividness and emotional depth.
Chair of the judging panel, Max Porter, called the book “a radical translation which ruffles language, to create new textures in a plurality of Englishes,” adding that the result is “genuinely new for English readers.”
Mushtaq, who is also known for her work as a lawyer and activist, reflected on the significance of the award during her acceptance speech. “This book was born from the belief that no story is ever small,” she said. “In a world that often tries to divide us, literature remains one of the lost sacred spaces where we can live inside each other's minds, if only for a few pages.”
Bhasthi’s translation has been praised for preserving the multilingual and musical essence of the original Kannada text. She chose to retain Kannada, Urdu and Arabic words in the English version, aiming to reflect the region’s everyday speech patterns. Speaking at a recent event at Champaca Bookstore in Bengaluru, she said, “None of us speaks ‘proper English’ in Karnataka… I wanted Indian readers to hear the deliberate Kannada hum behind it.”
In an earlier interview with The New Indian Express, Mushtaq addressed the personal dimensions of her writing. “I was asked to write about my contexts, and so I did. But at the same time, I didn’t want to be confined within the identity of the ‘Muslim woman’,” she said.
Heart Lamp is the first short story collection to win the International Booker Prize and only the second Indian title overall, following Geetanjali Shree’s Tomb of Sand, which won in 2022.
Fiammetta Rocco, Administrator of the prize, described the book as “a testament to the enduring fight for women's rights, translated with sympathy and ingenuity,” encouraging readers of all backgrounds to engage with its themes.
The 2025 shortlist featured works translated from Danish, French, Japanese and Italian. Each shortlisted book received £5,000, divided between the author and translator.
A NEW dance-theatre production explores how women enforce patriarchal rules upon their daughters and the consequent impact on family and societal structures, its artistic director said.
Choreographer Amina Khayyam uses Kathak, the classical Indian dance in her new production – Bibi Rukiya’s Reckless Daughter – to raise awareness about gender prejudice in ethnic communities.
In an interview with Eastern Eye, Khayyam also stressed the importance of mutual support among women during challenging situations.
Loosely based on Federico García Lorca’s The House of Bernarda Alba, the 70-minute show is set in modern, inner-city migrant communities.
The story centres on widow Bibi Rukiya, who restricts her three daughters’ freedom to maintain family honour and secure marriages. One daughter challenges her mother’s authority and questions her role as a woman.
Khayyam said, “I have a fondness for Lorca and the subjects he covers, particularly because they still resonate in our communities and culture. I work with women’s groups across the UK, particularly those who have difficult backgrounds like domestic violence or mental health issues, and I find those stories from Lorca really resonate with these communities,”
Bibi Rukiya was created over 18 months through workshops with women’s community groups across Britain. Participants collaborated with professional artists from the Amina Khayyam Dance Company to explore mother-daughter relationships.
Khayyam said these shaped the content and ensured the production reflects genuine experiences.
“I take the subject to them and then explore it through movement and storytelling, hearing their perspectives. When these women come back to see the performance, they see themselves and can relate to the stories,” the artist said.
Workshops were conducted in London, Luton and Birmingham for the production and more than 250 women took part.
Khayyam said, “Our show examines how women impose patriarchal rules on their daughters and the consequences thereof. We investigate why women perpetuate these structures and whom they serve by doing so, facilitating self-discovery, rather than providing answers.
“Centuries of conditioning have established clear, hierarchical gender roles in our society. Women who’ve experienced lifelong suffering often expect their daughters and daughters-in-law to endure similar hardships, following the principle, ‘I suffered, so you suffer now’, rather than breaking this cycle.
“We express these revelations through dance, movement and storytelling, bringing professional dancers and female musicians to the stage. Participants are encouraged to articulate their experiences in their native languages – Punjabi, Gujarati, Bengali, Hindi and English – which we then develop into poetry or narrative.”
She added, “We teach Kathak basics and mudras, providing theatrical elements that combine movement and text. While some participants initially resist dancing due to cultural taboos, most ultimately embrace it upon discovering its emotional benefits. We maintain women-only environments to ensure participants feel safe to express themselves freely.”
Khayyam, who is British Bangladeshi, began her Kathak dance training with Alpana Sengupta and progressed to professional level with Sushmita Ghosh at The Bhavan in London.
She then made her professional debut at the Southbank Centre.
Describing the use of Kathak to express complex emotions in the show, she said, “Kathak comes from katha, which means storyteller. We explore many different emotions within our form, and as we are storytellers, it lends itself to tell those stories. “In Kathak, we have many different tools – like spins with rhythmic footwork – as well as storytelling mudras, head gestures; all of this can come into play when we’re creating stories.”
Khayyam said the show uses music, movement and footwork to depict complex themes.
“In one scene there’s a conflict between the mother and the three daughters. We’re adapting it to three daughters as opposed to the five daughters originally in the book. There’s something called sawal jawab – question and answer.
“Through the footwork, the daughters are having a huge head-to-head with each other, and one of the best ways to bring that positively and impactfully is through sawal jawab – asking questions and giving answers – only through footwork.”
Set up in 2013 and based in Slough, the Amina Khayyam Dance Company has 15 pieces of work to its credit, with 160 shows in 40 venues in the UK and abroad.
Khayyam said her hope was for audiences to “go away and think about what they just saw”.
She added, “Sometimes we’re quite blinkered; we just carry on with life without questioning things, and I would like people to be able to question.
“Second, I’d like those south Asian women, both those we’ve worked with and those we haven’t, to be able to stop and think, ‘This is something we have in our community. How do we deal with this? How do we change it? How do we evolve this situation and empower these women who are trapped in it?’ With every show we’ve done in the past, we like to leave a question with the audience.
“It’s also about awareness. Sometimes we walk down the street and there’s a huge tree, but we never notice it – we take it for granted. Then suddenly we look up and think, “Wow, this tree is amazing.” We want to bring this kind of awareness into their lives, to recognise what’s happening and how we can help each other.
“In the workshops with women, I stressed that they need to support each other, because often that support isn’t there. We’re judging a lot, gossiping, and we need to support each other when we see difficult situations. That’s what I would like the show to bring about.”
Bibi Rukiya’sReckless Daughter will have its premiere at the Birmingham Hippodrome next Thursday (22) and Friday (23), followed by a national tour starting in autumn 2025
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Darren Henley : Art can make people happier and healthier
Darren Henley posed the question: “What’s our higher aim at the Arts Council?” And he offered the answer: “If I have my three words, it’s ‘creating happier lives’.” He firmly believes the arts bring happiness.
In the 10 years he has travelled to every corner of England as chief executive of Arts Council England, Henley has been greatly encouraged by the British Asian artistic fraternity. Many are beholden to the Arts Council.
He spoke warmly, for instance, of Indhu Rubasingham’s inaugural programme as artistic director of the National Theatre, and also of others such as dancer Sita Patel, Milap Fest in Liverpool, and the Rifco Theatre Company in Watford.
Speaking ahead of Eastern Eye’s annual Arts, Culture & Theatre Awards (ACTA) next Friday (23), he displayed a remarkable mastery of his subject – which is also evident in the latest edition of his book, The Arts Dividend: How Investment in Culture Creates Happier Lives.
Darren Henley's book
First written in 2016, the book was revised in 2020, just before the pandemic, and again in 2025. Henley sees parallels between his work and a classic hailed as “the finest book about England and the English”.
Henley writes: “Although I can’t claim to write with anything approaching his supreme elegance, style or enduring impact, I like to think that this book follows in the tradition of JB Priestley’s 1934 classic, English Journey.”
That said, Henley is lucid and clear: “Like Priestley, I hope to shine a spotlight on parts of England – and their artists, arts organisations, museums and libraries – that have not always enjoyed the nationwide attention they deserve, nor the benefits such attention can bring.
“Unlike Priestley, I cannot lay claim to the best subtitle of any work in this genre: ‘Being a rambling but truthful account of what one man saw and heard and felt and thought during a journey through England during the autumn of the year 1933.’ But this, too, is a book rooted in the reality of what I have witnessed on a non-stop journey through villages, towns and cities right across England.
“It is, I suppose, my own rambling, but truthful account of what I saw and heard and felt and thought as I journeyed through England’s arts and culture scene some nine decades after Priestley did.”
In his First Word, Henley says: “My central argument – that public investment in art and culture can help people to lead happier, healthier, more fulfilling lives – remains the same.”
Indhu Rubasingham
On “Reflecting Everyone’s Diversity”, he seeks to be inclusive: “When I talk about diversity in this book, I am referring to people who possess one or more of the personal characteristics that are protected under the law by the Equality Act of 2010: age, disability, gender reassignment, marriage and civil partnership, pregnancy and maternity, race, religion or belief, sex and sexual orientation.”
He states: “The colour of an actor’s skin shouldn’t be something that needs to be remarked on here. But I believe I must, because there is still a long way to go in the creative industries to ensure that our workforce is sufficiently reflective of the way England looks today.”
Like Priestley, Henley has also focused on Bradford: “During my visits to Bradford over the past few years, I have always been left buzzing with excitement by the Bradford Literature Festival, under the leadership of Syima Aslam. Its artistic programming, which has the explicit aim of reflecting the work of people from all communities, has created one of the most diverse UK literary festivals in existence. With investment from Bradford University, Bradford Metropolitan District Council and Arts Council England, Syima and her team have created a cultural and literary festival designed for everyone in the city. Now, with increased national and international focus on Bradford as UK City of Culture 2025 – and the largest investment in literature of any of Arts Council England’s National Portfolio Organisations – more people will come to enjoy the artistic breadth and richness that the festival has to offer.”
Creative director Shanaz Gulzar and executive director Dan Bates at the launch of Bradford 2025 UK City of Culture, where Syima Aslam’s literature festival is central to the city’s arts scene
He also writes of catching Peanut Butter & Blueberries at the Kiln Theatre in Kilburn. Directed by Sameena Hussain, this beautiful, warm and witty debut full-length play by Suhaiymah Manzoor-Khan featured superb performances by Humera Syed and Usaamah Ibraheem Hussain.
This was, of course, where Rubasingham served as artistic director before breaking the glass ceiling to lead the National Theatre.
In his interview with Eastern Eye, conducted in the offices of the Arts Council in London, Henley stressed: “The National is really important. It is our national theatre. They do great work here in London, but they also have a network of work that we invest in as it takes it round the country.”
It has helped the play Dear England to go on tour.
The National gets more than £16 million (₹1.68 billion) from the Arts Council and £25 million (₹2.63 billion) in capital investment from the government.
He talked about Rubasingham’s appointment, a landmark in the evolution of British Asian artists: “Indhu’s is a fantastic, brilliant appointment for the National Theatre.
“I think she’s a very intelligent, thoughtful theatre practitioner. The work that she did at Kiln was absolutely outstanding. She will be a really exciting, creative leader at the National Theatre.” He said her inaugural programme “has been well received. She’ll enable a new generation of other directors and writers to come to the stage. She’s looking out to the world, in terms of what we can take from here, our National Theatre, to the world, but also what can we bring from the world to our National Theatre.”
Recalling some of the British Asian performances he had found memorable, he said: “Sita Patel did a fantastic Rite of Spring with the Bournemouth Symphony Orchestra, which I saw at Sadler’s Wells. She’s a dance artist, and they worked together on that. I’m very fond of the work that Milap Fest does in Liverpool. In terms of a British Asian theatre company, the work that Rifco do, based at Watford Palace, is really exciting. It’s growing, and talking to all sorts of audiences from all sorts of backgrounds.”
A still from the BBC crime drama Virdee, featuring Staz Nair and Aysha Kala
He mentioned Rifco’s forthcoming production of Surinderella: “They are going to do a fusion of Bollywood and pantomime. I haven’t seen that anywhere before. Each has a set of rules around which they do things. I’m curious to see how those two things fuse together.”
As in his book, he talked to Eastern Eye about the Arts Council’s investment in Bradford. With a large Muslim population, it is, of course, very different from the almost exclusively white city that Bradford-born Priestley had encountered.
“Bradford ’25 is a city where we have put a lot of money in,” confirmed Henley. “It’s created some really interesting and exciting artwork. It’s changing the stories that people who live there tell about the place. It’s making them a more demanding, more entitled audience. That’s a really positive thing we want. I want people to feel comfortable about demanding more of us as an investor in their artistic and cultural lives. They should. It’s their right.”
In passing, he praised BBC TV’s six-part crime drama Virdee, set in Bradford and based on local author A A Dhand’s novel City of Sinners.
He commented: “I suppose what’s interesting for someone like me is we are making an investment in creative people, and you don’t always know what’s going to come out of that. And I love it when everyone gets it right. That’s where innovation happens.”
He does not see British Asian arts being in a ghetto and separate from the mainstream: “This is not something that should be on the margins. You have amazing artists who are making amazing work for audiences. Sometimes, they will make work for discrete audiences and smaller groupings, but, often, they’ll make work for audiences from every background, because in the end, we’re talking about stories, we’re talking about artistic moments.”
Henley resolved right at the outset that far from working from home or in his office, he would spend half the week travelling around England. In his book, he writes: “After 18 months in the job, I stopped counting the places that I’d been to. By then, my tally had reached 157 different villages, towns and cities around England. In fact, I suspect that I’ve seen more artistic performances and exhibitions, visited more cultural organisations, and met more artists and art groups than anyone else in England during the past decade. Doing the job that I do, that’s exactly as it should be.”
Publicity poster for Rifco’s upcoming production Surinderella
All being well, he is expected to attend this year’s ACTA ceremony – and maintain the tradition of announcing the winner of the Emerging Artist category.
It was one of his colleagues who first tipped him off about Priestley’s English Journey many years ago.
Although he has long given up keeping a tally, he reassured Eastern Eye: “I’ve probably been everywhere that you’ve been on a train. I try to get off and go to those places. Obviously, I’ve been to all the big cities, but also to the towns that surround those places and to a lot of rural areas as well. I’ve been literally everywhere from Cumbria to Cornwall, Northumberland to Kent. I’ve tried to spread my time over the whole country to get a real understanding of the infrastructure and what makes our cultural sector. A big part of my job is advocating to government and the value of the investment they put into it.”
According to the government’s own figures, the creative industries earned the UK £124 billion (₹13 trillion) in 2023. No one has assessed what the British Asian contribution is, but it must now be significant. That is likely to grow because of the cultural agreement between the UK and India recently signed by culture secretary Lisa Nandy during a trip to Mumbai and Delhi.
Arts Council England, whose 10-year strategy for creativity runs from 2020 to 2030, will work closely with the Labour government and the culture secretary of the day. “But we work at arm’s length from the government,” Henley made clear. “One of the things that’s crucial for us is that artists have the freedom to make the work they want to make, have the conversations they want to have, have the thoughts and innovation they want to have.”
Altogether, to the 1,000 National Portfolio Organisations supported by the Arts Council, 275 new ones were added in the funding round in 2023.
JB Priestley’s English Journey
“We brought a lot of new organisations into the fold,” Henley pointed out. “I also believe passionately, that we need to have organisations that are making work and are led by people reflective of the whole country. New writing is important. New performers, new ways of doing things are important. Sometimes, it’s older or more traditional stories, but told in a completely new context. Shakespeare is utterly relevant. If you drill down into what Shakespeare is, it’s a set of stories often about relationships or situations that were obviously written a long time ago, but they’re absolutely relevant today.”
He does not like the word “subsidise” to describe the grants given by the Arts Council. “We make an investment, because I think ‘subsidised’ feels like market failure,” he argued. “Investment is more about possibility. We invest public money into individuals, artists and organisations, and we do that to improve people’s lives. The work that they do makes other people’s lives better. There’s no nobler thing to do than public investment to create happier lives. Happiness is a word I want to sort of reclaim. I don’t think it’s a weak word. Why are we on this earth if we don’t want to be happy? Isn’t it amazing that when you see a great performance, a dance or music or theatre, or you go to a gallery and see an amazing picture in front of you, it can take you to a different place? We need to talk about happiness more. We need to understand the things that make life worth living.
Rakesh Chaurasia performing at a Milap event
“It is also worth saying that art and culture and artists can also actually help conversations around the tougher things in life as well. That’s something quite unique that an artist can curate.”
He could have been referring to a play like Tanika Gupta’s A Tupperware of Ashes, which premiered at the National last year and dealt with the subject of dementia.
The Arts Council has a programme in Leicester called Talent 25, in which children are selected and exposed to museums, galleries, concerts and other cultural experiences over 25 years to assess what effect such an intervention has on their lives.
Poster for Peanut Butter & Blueberries, staged at the Kiln Theatre
Henley’s views on getting children to enjoy the arts will be taken to heart, especially by British Asian parents. He referred to one museum “where the chief executive bought a load of knee pads for his colleagues, and they went round on their knees to see what it would be like to be a toddler or a small child, what they could and couldn’t see”.
“Children are a really important audience,” he said, adding their experiences have to be age-appropriate. “We want to create the artists and also the audiences of the future. To be absolutely clear, you’ve got to be able to read and write, you’ve got to be able to add up. You should have an understanding of science and languages. What we need to make sure is we build the rounded human beings that we want to see in our society. Music and drama and art and design should be part of the core curriculum at school. For me, the three pillars of a really strong education for any young person are numeracy, literacy and creativity.”
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Deepa Paul explores non-monogamy, commitment and romance in her new book
It began as a 1,200-words essay, sort of a frequently asked questions (FAQ) explainer of being in an open marriage, before culminating in a bidding war involving multiple major publishing houses.
Her new book 'Ask Me How It Works'Instagram/ storiesbydeepa
Deepa Paul’s Ask Me How It Works does what it says on the tin. It’s her story of being in a committed marriage with her husband of 17 years, while the couple also date other people, with each other’s knowledge.
However, seven or eight years ago, no one was interested in publishing it, said Paul. When a writing coach suggested it was more than an essay, she wrote the draft and that led to a publishing deal.
“It’s basically almost unchanged from where I began. There was no grand vision. It was – what have I experienced, what have I learned from it, and what can I share?” Paul said.
She recalled a writing habit “to process my own experiences and to understand what’s going on in my life”.
Paul added, “Initially I started writing mainly for myself. There was a point at which I was receiving so many questions from men who I was open with on dating apps, and I remember thinking as a joke, almost like, ‘What if I could just send them something that would make my life easier.’”
“In the beginning it was called Ask Me How It Works:frequently asked questions about my open marriage. And this essay just got longer and longer.”
Paul, a half-Indian, half-Filipina writer, lives with her husband, Marcus, in Amsterdam, having moved there from Manila, where they both grew up. The couple have a young daughter, and Paul also has a boyfriend of five years in the city.
She was polyamorous at the time of writing the book, but said she is currently not dating anyone else.
Each chapter in her book dwells on the many questions raised by Paul’s curious dates – from how it started to the rules the couple follow, feelings, love and therapy.
“It’s always been about self discovery,” Paul said. “My preferred method of growth is to put myself in new situations and see how I adapt.
“It sounds very chaotic and maybe stressful for a lot of people, but I value adaptability and flexibility and being able to find out about myself through the mirror of relationships.
“I believe that an encounter with somebody – whether it’s for one night or for months or years or a lifetime – can mirror back to you things about yourself that you’ve never saw before.”
Paul was raised in the Philippines (the country is predominantly Catholic and divorce is banned), but when she moved to the Netherlands, realised there were opportunities to explore relationships outside her marriage. Over the course of more than a dozen chapters, she charts her journey as she and her husband seek encounters outside their marriage. Both are certain, however, that they want to be in the marriage and are committed to raising a family together.
Paul explained how her idea of marriage has transformed over time.
“What I learned from my parents, seeing their picture of love and commitment, was that we would build a life together, that we had shared goals and we would achieve them together,” she said.
“A family was definitely part of it. It felt like a big adventure we could go on together. Me moving to Singapore to be with him, (it) felt like I was giving a lot, but it also felt adventurous. Then moving to Amsterdam was another adventure. I saw marriage as a series of adventures for which I had found a partner.
“Now, I would say that’s changed in the sense that there’s much less ‘adventuring’. It’s more realistic that we are building a life together. We have shared goals, and those evolve over time.
“But now I believe our commitment is much more fluid and flexible, because it accommodates the versions of ourselves we can become as life changes. Motherhood was a big change, migration was a massive change, cancer was a huge change (Paul was diagnosed last year, underwent treatment and is now cancer-free).
“So, now we get to check in with each other and say, ‘okay, what does commitment look like for us, for the people we are now? It’s a lot more familiar, but it’s also flexible.”
Life in Amsterdam could not be more in contrast to Manila. In fact, in one of the final chapters, Paul explains what the book is about to her pre-teen daughter and waits tentatively for her response.
Her reaction? Paul and Marcus are not the only ones in their daughter’s class to have an open marriage.
“Welcome to Amsterdam!” she writes. “If I stayed in Manila, I don’t think I would have ever realised that non-monogamy is an option. I came to Amsterdam and I was almost shocked at how accepted it is – that it is an option available for us as a relationship style.”
Paul explores the many facets of relationships – established, committed or casual – as she and Marcus ‘open up’ their marriage. Having dating rules, establishing boundaries, testing them, adapting, building trust, maintaining faith in each other, therapy, co-parenting, pursuing careers and Covid lockdowns – Ask Me How It Works answers all the questions readers could possibly be curious about.
She said the effort was worth it. “I find working on relationships fulfilling. I think I’m a relationship nerd. I love talking about attachment styles and I believe the greatest fulfilment I derive from life is from relationships. It’s not from possessions or experiences. I love figuring out relationships – how somebody wants to be loved, what makes them feel special, feel safe.
“And then, when I realised I can also give that to them, I found myself expanding. I thought, ‘Oh, I didn’t think I could love this way, I didn’t think I could care for someone in this specific manner.’ And, somehow, I managed to keep track of all of them.”
Paul added, “I’m also very into the idea of experiencing pleasure in different ways, and I learned so much about my desires, but also my body. I have a really good relationship with my body – through the mirror of other people, and I do love that I have an identity.
“I’m encouraged and allowed to build an identity for myself that doesn’t revolve around being a wife and a mother. I can be 100 per cent a good wife and mother, but also be 100 per cent myself.
“And it’s not a trade-off. So, for me, that’s worth the extra effort, of what people think is so tiring.”
Although Paul is not dating anyone else apart from her boyfriend, she has seen a shift in the approach to monogamous and non-monogamous relationships, saying that while the latter are more accepted now, it’s not yet mainstream.
She has also observed how women in some conservative societies feel about desire. “In terms of attraction and desire, we’re taught that it’s a very destructive force, but it is also a force of great power – it can make people look and feel and come alive and be really present in their senses,” Paul said.
“I take a lot of inspiration, for example, from Audre Lorde’s essay The uses of erotic where she says, ‘once you’ve tapped into something that really gives you joy and aliveness, it’s like you can’t turn it off.’ It feeds so much into our lives and women are sort of stopped from doing that.”
She added, “But then, when we are at our most fully expressed and alive and just enjoying the deliciousness of life, who immediately benefits? Family and society, as well.”
Paul revealed she considered writing the book under a pseudonym.
However, she said, “If I cannot stand by my choices, my ups and my downs and my mistakes, and I can’t put my name and my face on it, then shame still has power over me.
“For me, it’s a powerful exercise to say, ‘Yeah, I did all of this and I made these mistakes, I cleaned them up, and I somehow turned them into a life that I love, with all the people I love along with me for the ride.
“If I had kept hiding that, I would not really have been freed,” she said.
“Regardless of whether you are monogamous or non-monogamous, people are messy.
“Life is unpredictable, emotions are messy. So we just do the best we can with the tools we have.”
Ask Me How It Works: Love in an Open Marriage by Deepa Paul, published by Viking, is out now
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Young participants have also been involved in backstage roles
The National Theatre’s annual Connections Festival will return this June, celebrating its 30th anniversary with a week-long programme of youth theatre performances from across the UK.
Running from 24 to 28 June, the festival will also mark the reopening of the Dorfman Theatre, which has been closed since November 2024 for government-funded refurbishment works.
Over the past three months, more than 5,000 young people from over 270 schools and youth theatre groups have performed in venues across 33 professional stages nationwide. From this wide participation, ten theatre groups have been selected to perform at the National Theatre in London.
Each group will stage one of ten newly commissioned plays, offering young performers the opportunity to explore contemporary themes including identity, climate change, and community.
The selected groups and their plays are:
Fresh Air by Vickie Donoghue – Central Foundation Boys’ School, London
Ravers by Rikki Beadle-Blair – HOME Young Company, Manchester
Mia and the Fish by Satinder Chohan – Abbey Grange Academy, Leeds
The Company of Trees by Jane Bodie – Hamilton District Youth Theatre, Lanarkshire
Their Name is Joy by May Sumbwanyambe – Nottingham Girls Academy Theatre Company
Saba’s Swim by Danusia Samal – Central Youth Theatre, Wolverhampton
Normalised by Amanda Verlaque – Brassneck Youth, Belfast
No Regrets by Gary McNair – Glasgow Acting Academy
Brain Play by Chloë Lawrence-Taylor and Paul Sirett – Chatham and Clarendon Grammar School, Ramsgate
YOU 2.0 by Alys Metcalf – Everyman Youth Theatre, Cardiff
Young participants have also been involved in backstage roles, including lighting, costume design, directing and composing, helping to realise their productions from start to finish.
Indhu Rubasingham, Director and Co-Chief Executive of the National Theatre, said: “I am really pleased to welcome ten youth groups from all corners of the UK to the NT for this landmark anniversary festival of Connections. Everyone should have the opportunity to experience the power of theatre-making.”
Since launching, the festival has engaged over 125,000 young people, with former participants including actors Keira Knightley, David Oyelowo, Rose Ayling-Ellis, and Callum Scott Howells.
Each year, ten new plays are commissioned for Connections, contributing to a growing archive of over 235 scripts written specifically for young performers.
Tickets are available for £5 per show, or £8 for two performances in one evening. All shows will feature captioning for accessibility.