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My top 10 Legendary British Asian traits by The Native Immigrants

Cling-film on remote controls: We never under­stood the concept of putting cling-film on remote controls in our houses growing up until you realise most of our dinners were consumed in front of the telly, and this handy conception alleviated the problem of getting oil and haldi-stained fingers all over the control. At the time, ridiculous, now look­ing back, genius! Frozen coriander in ice cream tubs: You know the scenario: You’ve come home from being out in a scorching hot summer’s day. Yes, you can con­sume copious amounts of cold water to appease your dry throat, but where’s the fun in that? In this equation, ice cream is your only true solution. You gallop down to your freezer, pull out that triple chocolate Carte D’or tub, have your spoon at the ready, open the container and it’s frozen corian­der. Cue agonising delirium. Stupidly expensive weddings inviting everyone you’ve met: As our recent shows have covered all the chaos of our own wedding, we also put the spotlight on Asian weddings in general. The idea of one-upmanship is so prevalent in our commu­nities that families are happier to go bankrupt rath­er than have a smaller wedding than their nearest and dearest. Gone are the days of paper plates in a school hall with your uncle playing some cassettes for music, in come the helicopter entrances and Bollywood stars brought in as special guests. Elaborate tissue boxes: Both of us experienced this growing up, and still do to this day. The mini­malist classy look gets lost in Asian houses, as the overriding concept is ‘the gaudier the better!’ Nothing encompasses that more than over-elaborate tissue boxes. In the Swami Baracus family home, we’ve still got a killer dark blue box with gold trim­mings. It’s the kind of thing you’d find as part of…

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