HIRA ALI’S BOOK DISCUSSES HOW MEN CAN EFFECT CHANGE
AFTER writing the book Her Way To The Top, Hira Ali would meet well-intentioned men keen to support women, but were unsure where to start.
Then after further research she found out that to affect real change, you must appeal to individuals within an organisation who can drive that change. This led Hira towards writing Her Allies: A Practical Toolkit to Help Men Lead Through Advocacy. Her second book takes readers on a progressive allyship journey where they learn simple, yet effective actionable strategies to challenge themselves, before moving on to challenge others and ultimately organisations, institutions, and systems at large.
Eastern Eye caught up with Hira Ali to discuss her timely new book, some of its key lessons, women’s safety and how men can be part of a positive change.
What is the aim of your new book?
At its core, Her Allies: A Practical Toolkit to Help Men Lead Through Advocacy offers men strategies they need to become powerful advocates for gender equality. But, at its heart, this book is an invitation to all men who are willing to take that bold first step and transform good intention into meaningful action. Men with the courage to read will embark on a progressive journey that ends only when women realise the same opportunities, recognition, and respect that men already command. They will become selfless pioneers for their children, grandchildren, and subsequent generations.
What are the key messages you want to put across?
Many sources recognise that men generally have good intentions but fail to take action. The book explores reasons why men are hesitant to fully commit. By pinpointing the root of the problem, it’s often easier to address it. The book also highlights benefits of allyship such as improved psychological and physical health; more rewarding relationships with women; freedom to share financial responsibilities with a female spouse or partner; freedom to be more involved with children and freedom from limiting masculine gender norms.
It is interesting that the book supports men to advance gender equality, but also recognises that allies do not have all the answers and can make mistakes.
Authentic and active allies acknowledge that while they can’t understand all viewpoints, they can be open to learning, improving, and changing by building self-awareness to foster fairness in everyday interactions, free from assumptions and biases. When they become allies, they will embrace that allyship is a process, a journey of development and evolution.
What are the other key messages in the book?
Another key message is that allies are not saviours, protectors or knights in shining armour who need to rescue women. While this may be true and appropriate in some situations, a large majority of women don’t need saving or wish to be rescued. Hence, allies need to avoid appearing patronising, infantilising, condescending or all-knowing. They need to work in complementary roles side-by-side as co-pilots, advocates, mentors, sponsors, defenders, and amplifiers, who seek to level the playing field.
Why is this an important book for men to pick up?
Men looking for practical and meaningful ways to challenge the status quo and be a supportive ally will find a wealth of information to educate themselves and be an inclusive advocate.
Is the biggest challenge to get men to actually read the book?
Yes, that could be a challenge and that’s why I wanted this book to be a toolkit with less fluff and more action. After deciding to write this book, I researched existing material on allyship. It took me time to figure out how I could present the information in an easy-tounderstand way that is relevant to my audience from different countries and cultures. I realised I could best achieve this by building on the content in the form of a journey. Some may be new to this journey, while others may be halfway along or already in the final stages.
Is there anything for women to take away from the book?
Most definitely! Given how many of us were raised and conditioned, sometimes women have biases against other women too. From time to time, I have to check my own inherent biases and genderblind spots; I still have not mastered the art of allyship. Although I am a woman, and a woman of colour, I’m constantly learning and evolving, so I am positive women will also gain a lot from this book.
Do you think a change is happening in society, in terms of women’s rights and safety?
A lot of progress has been made in terms of women’s rights, but in terms of safety and protection we still have a long way to go. After the dreadful killing of Sarah Everard, the issue of violence against women and girls has been at the forefront and several figures from across the political spectrum have offered proposals to tackle the ongoing blight. One well-received proposal labels misogyny as a hate crime. Police forces across England and Wales will identify these crimes as such when a victim believes a crime has been prompted by ‘hostility based on their sex.’
Tell us more about that?
Home Office minister Baroness Williams said that data would initially be gathered ‘on an experimental basis,’ pending recommendations for a longer-term solution from the Law Commission, which has conducted a review of hate crime legislation. The government has announced an additional £25 million for better lighting and CCTV, as well as a pilot scheme, which would see plain-clothes officers in pubs and clubs. It also promised to bring in landmark legislation to toughen up sentences and put more police on streets. More needs to be done on issues such as harassment of women, domestic homicide sentencing and more support for victims of rape.
Why do you think it is important for men to get involved in the conversation?
It’s important for men to be involved as they have the position and power to enact these changes and help us navigate a system and world primarily designed where they largely remain a dominant force occupying powerful roles everywhere.
Why should we pick up your book Her Allies?
Anyone who not just acknowledges responsibility but wants to actively participate in championing a fairer and more inclusive world should pick up the book for useful and actionable tips, which they can start implementing the very same day.
Jay's grandma’s popcorn from Gujarat is now selling out everywhere.
Ditched the influencer route and began posting hilarious videos online.
Available in Sweet Chai and Spicy Masala, all vegan and gluten-free
Jayspent 18 months on a list. Thousands of names. Influencers with follower counts that looked like phone numbers. He was going to launch his grandmother's popcorn the right way: send free bags, wait for posts, pray for traction. That's the playbook, right? That's what you do when you're a nobody selling something nobody asked for.
Then one interaction made him snap. The entitlement. The self-importance. The way some food blogger treated his family's recipe like a favour they were doing him. He looked at his spreadsheet. Closed it. Picked up his phone and decided to burn it all down.
Now he makes videos mocking the same people he was going to beg for help. Influencers weeping over the wrong luxury car. Creators demanding payment for chewing food on camera. Someone having a breakdown about ice cubes. And guess what? The internet ate it up. His popcorn keeps selling out. And from Gujarat, his grandmother's 60-year-old recipe is now moving units because her grandson got mad enough to be funny about it.
Jay’s grandma’s popcorn from Gujarat is now selling out everywhere Instagram/daadisnacks
The kitchen story
Daadi means grandmother in Hindi. Jay's daadi came to America from Gujarat decades ago. Every weekend, she made popcorn with the spices she grew up with, including cardamom, cinnamon, and chilli mixes. It was her way of keeping home close while living somewhere that didn't taste like it.
Jay wanted that in stores. Wanted brown faces in the snack aisle. It didn’t happen overnight. It took a couple of years to get from a family recipe to something they could actually sell. Everyone pitched in, including his grandmom, uncle, mum. The spices come from small local farmers. There are just two flavours for now, Sweet Chai and Spicy Masala. It’s all vegan and gluten-free, packed in bright bags that instantly feel South Asian.
The videos don't look like marketing. They look like someone venting at 11 PM after scrolling too long. He nails the nasal influencer voice. The fake sympathy. “I can’t believe this,” he says in that exaggerated influencer tone, “they gave me the cheaper car, only eighty grand instead of one-twenty.” That clip alone blew up, pulling in close to nine million views.
Most people don't know they're watching a snack brand. They think it's social commentary. Jay never calls himself an influencer. He says he’s a creator, period. There’s a difference, and he makes sure people know it. His TikTok has around three hundred thousand followers, Instagram about half that. The comments read like a sigh of relief, people fed up with fake polish, finally hearing someone say what everyone else was thinking.
This fits into something called deinfluencing; people pushing back against the buy-everything-trust-nobody cycle. But Jay's version has teeth. He's naming names, calling out the economics. Big venture money flows to chains with good lighting. Family businesses with actual stories get ignored because their content isn't slick enough.
Jay watched his New York neighbourhood change. Chains moved in. Influencers posted about places that had funding and were aesthetic. The old spots, the family ones, got left behind. His videos are about that gap. The erosion of local culture by money and aesthetics.
"Big chains and VC-funded businesses are promoted at the expense of local ones," he said. His content doesn't just roast influencers. It promotes other small food makers who can't afford to play the game. He positions Daadi as a defender of something real against something plastic.
And it's working. Not just philosophically. Financially. The videos drive traffic. People click through, try the popcorn, come back. The company can't keep stock. That's the proof.
Daadi popcorn features authentic Gujarat flavours like Sweet Chai and Spicy Masala, all vegan and gluten-free Daadi Snacks
The blowback
People unfollow because they think he's too harsh. Jay's take: "I would argue I need to be meaner."
In May, he posted that he's not chasing content creation money like most people at his follower count. "I post to speak my mind and help my family's snack biz." That's a different model. Most brands pay influencers to make everything look perfect. They chase viral polish, and Jay does the opposite. In fact, he weaponises rawness and treats criticism like a product feature.
The internet mostly backs him. Reddit threads light up with support. One commenter was "toxic influencers choking on their matcha lattes searching their Balenciaga bags." Another: "Influencers are boring and unoriginal and can get bent." The anger is shared. Jay simply gave it a microphone and a snack to buy.
Jay's success says something about where things are going. People are done with curated perfection. They can smell the artificiality now. They respond to brands that feel like humans rather than committees. Daadi doesn't sell aspiration. Doesn't sell a lifestyle. Sells popcorn and a point of view.
The quality matters, including the spices, the sourcing, and the family behind it. But the edge matters too. He’s not afraid to say what most brands tiptoe around. “We just show who we are,” Jay says. “No pretending, no gloss. People can feel that and that’s when they reach for the popcorn.”
Most small businesses can't afford to play the traditional game. Can't pay influencers. Can't hire agencies. Can't fake their way into feeds. Maybe they don't need to. Maybe honesty and humour can cut through if they're sharp enough. If the product backs it up. If the story is real and the person telling it isn't trying to sound like a PR script.
This started with a list Jay didn't use. The business took off the moment he stopped trying to play by the usual rules and started speaking his mind. Turns out, honesty sells. And yes, the popcorn really does taste good.
Daadi Snacks merch dropInstagram/daadisnacks
The question is whether this scales. Whether other small businesses watch this and realise they don't need to beg for attention from people who don't care. Right now, Daadi keeps selling out. People keep watching. The grandmother's recipe that was supposed to need influencer approval is doing fine without it. Better than fine. Turns out the most effective marketing strategy might just be giving a damn and not being afraid to show it.
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