INDIANS will have mixed feelings that Prince Andrew, now referred to by the grander-sounding “Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor”, did not make a pass at anyone in India, as far as is known, although he visited the country on several occasions.
This despite India producing six Miss World winners – Reita Faria (1966), Aishwarya Rai (1994), Diana Hayden (1997), Yukta Mookhey (1999), Priyanka Chopra (2000), and Manushi Chhillar (2017).
Andrew meets Indian Navy officers aboard INS Viraat in Mumbai in 2012Punit Paranjpee/AFP via Getty Images
Also add three Miss Universe winners – Sushmita Sen (1994), Lara Dutta (2000), and Harnaaz Sandhu (2021).
Like his friend, the late Jeffrey Epstein, there has been precious little diversity, equity or inclusion when it comes to his taste in women.
The arrest last week on his 66th birthday of Andrew Albert Christian Edward, The (former) Prince Andrew, Duke of York, KG, GCVO, CD, ADC(P), the second son and third child of Queen Elizabeth II, was a godsend to royal correspondents. They were given acres of space on the front page to tell the story.
Andrew receives a solar lantern in Mumbai in 2010Indraneel Mukherjee/AFP via Getty Images
It was a tragedy for royal correspondents when Princess Diana died, because she had kept the “ratpack” (as these reporters called themselves) in gainful employment.
The monarchy will survive, because it managed to do so even after the abdication of King Edward VIII in 1936. It will also get over this Andrew tamasha. Powerful newspapers will ensure the monarchy lives on because royal scandals are good for circulation. Andrew’s arrest does not pose “an existential threat” to the monarchy. In fact, there is nothing like notoriety to bring more tourist into the UK.
Andrew speaks at an event in Mumbai in 2008.Pal Pillai/AFPvia Getty Images
And Andrew did not have “blood shot eyes”, as an overexcited Andrew Marr claimed in a chat with Matt Frei on LBC. As Andrew went home after being questioned by police, the camera flash caught his eyes. But on this occasion, the “red eye” correction was deliberately not done to make him look even more haunted. If Andrew ends up in prison – not very likely – it will not be for any sexual misdemeanours, but for leaking confidential information when he was the UK trade envoy. Al Capone was brought down not for murder, but tax evasion.
The recent stories about Andrew serve the useful purpose of distracting attention from Epstein’s relationship with US president Donald Trump. According to the New York Times, “the (Epstein) files are peppered with references to Mr Trump, who had been a close friend of Mr Epstein’s until the early 2000s. While Mr Trump has repeatedly downplayed the relationship, the two men bonded over their pursuit of young women.”
In Britain, it is more convenient to maintain the focus on Andrew, which is a bit like kicking a dead cat. Andrew stirred up controversy even as a UK trade “special representative”.
The late Lord Swraj Paul, who served as an ambassador for British business from 1998 to 2010 and represented Britain on 75 occasions across 30 countries, once joked: “I used to do the same job as Prince Andrew.”
With his wife Aruna sitting by his side, Swraj chuckled: “He gets the girls, I got the….” He left the sentence unfinished.
Andrew visited India in January 2001 to attend events marking the 50th anniversary of the Indian Republic. He went again in November 2008 to represent the UK during official trade and investment missions. Another trip followed in March 2010 as a trade envoy, when he met business leaders and government officials to promote British commercial interests.
There was a week-long trip in May 2012 when he was sent by the Queen as part of her Diamond Jubilee celebrations to Mumbai, Kolkata, Chennai, Bangalore and Nagaland.
The visit would “incorporate a wide range of themes, from inclusive development and defence ties to the growing business relationship,” the British High Commission said then in a statement.
It added the engagements would illustrate how British-Indian relations had changed over the Queen’s 60-year reign. In Kolkata, Andrew visited a vocational education centre run by the Women’s Interlink Foundation.
There was a scathing report in 2010 from Simon Wilson after he retired from the British diplomatic service, having served as deputy high commissioner in Kolkata from 2006 to 2009.
Wilson said Andrew “was a regular visitor to Bahrain during the five years I worked there as Britain’s Deputy Head of Mission (2001-2005). Unfortunately, HRH the Duke of York was more commonly known among the British diplomatic community in the Gulf as HBH: His Buffoon Highness. This nickname stemmed from his childish obsession with doing exactly the opposite of what had been agreed in pre-visit meetings with his staff. He appeared to regard himself as an expert in every matter.”
Wilson went on: “Colleagues put this behaviour down to an inferiority complex about being mentally challenged… his attitude certainly drew attention to the fact that he was usually out of his depth at meetings….He assumed the title of Special Representative for International Trade and Investment in 2001. Officially, he doesn’t get paid for the role, but the style in which I observed him carrying it out beggared belief. He travelled with a team of six, including equerries, private secretaries, protection officers and a valet….There was also a 6ft-long ironing board that he insisted went everywhere he went. On one of his visits to Bahrain, I remember the valet carrying the ironing board through the front entrance of the Ritz-Carlton Hotel.”
There was a personal anecdote from Wilson: “My wife, who has a passing resemblance to Sarah Ferguson, soon became the butt of a number of schoolboy jokes by the prince. He even suggested that my wife had ‘touched him up’ under the table. This was our first introduction to his boorish behaviour.”
Wilson continued: “Of course, royals love other royals so, from that point of view, Prince Andrew’s role probably works for the Gulf — but less so for other countries. In India, for example, where I saw him in action at the flagship UK Trade and Investment India Business Awards gala in Mumbai in November 2006, people seemed less impressed with minor royals. This was particularly the case after HBH delivered a speech in a leaden tone and then left official guests open mouthed as he skedaddled off to a private party (not in his official programme) at the home of India’s richest businessman, Mukesh Ambani.”
Wilson concluded: “It’s well known by diplomats there are serious shortcomings in HBH’s operations – but who is going to put their career on the line by criticising a member of the Royal Family?”
In 2011, the Daily Telegraph published a letter from Stephen Day, 73, a former British ambassador to Qatar and Tunisia, who revealed he had complained about Andrew to the foreign secretary and other ministers: “It takes a lot to bring former British Ambassadors to criticise a member of the Royal Family in public, but it is surely now recognised that the Duke’s activities are doing such serious damage to the Royal Family itself and to Britain’s political, diplomatic and commercial interests that an entirely new role should be found for him as soon as possible.” When Andrew was forced to step down as trade envoy in 2011, he declared: “As the evolution of my role continues apace and in order to reflect the changes I have outlined, I have decided that the label I gave myself when I began this role of Special Representative has served its purpose and is no longer necessary to the work that I do today and, more importantly, in the future.”
What’s happened in the past lends perspective to the current entertaining theatre. Andrew has been damaged goods for a very long time. Britain isn’t broken nor is the country about to become the Islamic Republic of Inglistan. We have Coronation Street, EastEnders, The Archers – and Randy Andy.
